In John 10:10 Jesus promises His followers abundant life. This blog is about my life as His follower.

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

Men and Respect

What does respect mean to you?

Do you feel like you respect your husband?

Can respect be given, unconditionally, just like love? Or does respect have to earned?

My husband and I are very slowly reading through Dr. Emerson Eggerichs' book entitled Love & Respect. We're reading through it slowly because we want to change the way we think and we've found that by going slowly it allows the truths to sink down into our hearts and translate into our actions.

It has opened my eyes up in a whole new way to men's need for respect. I've also come to realize that respect can be given unconditionally and in fact should be given unconditionally to my husband.

I've always believed that love is given unconditionally but that respect must be earned. As we've been reading through, Love & Respect however, I've come to see that respect needs to be given unconditionally just as much as love. It's been helpful for me to think of it to a certain extent in the manner I think of authority people at work. Fortunately for most of my work life I've been totally blessed with awesome bosses. But there was once I had a terrible boss (justice did prevail however and she was fired from the company!) or my bosses' boss at various times may have been not so great. However, I always treated those people extremely respectfully due to their position. No matter how they acted, I was respectful.

I've learned that this is what I should do for my husband. More than that, I've come to realize that this is what his heart craves just as mine craves unconditional love.

I've seen, the more I look for and take opportunities to show my husband respect, the more he desires to spend time with me and does little loving actions.

It's a win-win cycle.

1 comment:

Judi "Jlo" Moran (2006) said...

Oh, you are so on target, Tracy. If I had learned this concept earlier in my marriage, I believe it could have been saved.
I now teach younger women the importance of respecting their husbands in my "course": Marriage Lessons Learned Too Late.
Thanks for your witness to God's work in your life.
Jlo

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