Are you a perfectionist or just a high achiever?

This question interests me because I'm a recovering perfectionist who wants to be a high achiever.

Perfectionism is my enemy.

I've struggled against it for as long as I can remember. Although you'd never know it to look at me since I'm certainly not perfect in any way!

But I've often let it rob me of joy.

I want things so just right that when I fail, as everyone is prone to at some point, I sometimes want to just give up because it won't be "just right" any more.

I even have daydreams about things being perfect; total organization in my home, perfectly planned meals and family traditions, the best in my career, etc.

I want change and am working to do so. I want to be someone who strives for excellence in a healthy way but not a perfectionist. I think healthy people who desire excellence take genuine pleasure in trying to meet high standards. I've been known, in my perfectionistic mode, to be full of self-doubts and fears of disapproval, ridicule and rejection. I want to have drive, but not be driven.

It seems like I've been doing well in this arena but I find that I have to be on the aware because it creeps up on me. I'm reminded of the verse in 1 Peter 5:8 that says to:

Be of sober spirit, be on the alert Your adversary, the devil, prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour.

For me, one of the forms the enemy takes on is the voice of perfectionism.

Do you ever struggle with this black/white perfectionism?